i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Randomize