apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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