drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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