Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize