So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize