I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
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