do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
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i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
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and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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