I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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