So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
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No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
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I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize