he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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