idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
smell my finger.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize