We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize