Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
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I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
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Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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