Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
As shirtless as possible
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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