Fine. I'll sleep in my office
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this beer tastes like vomit already
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize