i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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