just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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