In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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