I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize