she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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