So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
they need to just BURY HIM!
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
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he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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