I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize