alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize