I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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