you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Randomize