She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize