thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
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She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize