yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
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Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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