Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
You are a genius and a whore.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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