The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
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