the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
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rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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