how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
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