she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
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