Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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