He kissed a someone with a penis
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Are we still banned from the library?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
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