I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize