I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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