You just made me feel so damn special
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
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Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
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I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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