Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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