I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize