There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
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