Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize