So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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