Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
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