Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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