im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize