do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize