she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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