I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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