You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
3 2 1 whiskey
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize